Ah, Brian Cowen, bless his cotton socks – as an ex of mine used to say.
But really he waited around so long to get the top job, to be King of Ireland, head of all he can see – and it came tumbling down around his feet.
No wonder he is so angry – I walked passed him on the street before he was Ireland’s top man and he really wasn’t shouting at passers by or kicking cars – but the news reports now refer all too often to Brian Cowen angrily denounced.. Brian Cowen angrily defended…
He is so good at defending he is due a spot on the Irish team – well the belly might keep him out.
And what is the problem with his belly? Apart from being normal middle aged size there seams to be no reason to have the cops out defending his dignity – because seriously the man has no dignity the way he thinks it is still fine to make everyone else pay for his mistakes when he gave the tax breaks to all his pals.
But would I do anything different? Doubt it. “Hey Leslie would you throw me a few euro in the next budget.” Aye Sean what would be in it for me my pal?
But really all joking aside, I don’t want to see any physical harm to come to him, so a few words to the wise – what!!! Like the man is not wise already – €300,000 per year.
Firstly lose some weight
Next time you’re outside, walk for 20 or 30 minutes – then after a few months try going a bit faster. I know you don’t have time – but just remember you’re the King of Ireland they can all wait on you.
Stop eating the pies! No not even on weekends or when you feel like the world is collapsing around you and you need that little midnight snack after a few beers – say after me – no more pies.
Try counting to ten – now I know you have to speak, and speak quickly to drown out those gob shits on the other side – but no one has said you can’t count fast.
And lastly stop getting so angry it is a dam disgrace when the King cannot control his emotions.
Live well and long you have another three years of us baying for your blood. Long live the King.
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